How many of you have thrown around the idea of eloping once or twice while trying to plan your wedding day? I know I did! Several times I simply wanted to throw out the whole plan we had been working on and just elope the two of us. So what does it take to elope?
First, what does it mean to "elope"?
A lot of people love the idea of eloping but aren't sure what it means and even today, the very concept of elopements is changing quickly in the wedding industry.
When I first heard the word elopement I associated it with going to the court house or running off to Vegas to get hitched without telling anyone. It was a somewhat of a rebellious thing to do and I distinctly remember my mother saying "if you ever run off and elope I'll throttle you". Of course she said this with all the love in her heart and I knew that when the day came to have a wedding, I would most likely want my people around me.
So what does this mean for you? Honestly, eloping means whatever you want it to mean. It can be going to the courthouse super casually or running off in secret with just your fiancé to some exotic location to exchange your vows.
It 👏🏼can 👏🏼be 👏🏼whatever 👏🏼you 👏🏼want.
In the simplest terms, eloping means shifting the perspective of the day. With a traditional wedding there is a lot of expectation for the couple to host the perfect day, to create the best decorations, to have the most out of this world food and to entertain your guests from start to finish. With eloping you take the focus away from the production element and place it back onto the couple getting married.
So if the "stuff" that comes with having a traditional wedding really doesn't appeal to you and your fiancé, eloping might just be the perfect option for y'all.
Let's dig a little deeper into why you want to elope
Whether or not you have been planning on eloping from the beginning or if it something you stumbled upon while planning a traditional wedding, you and your fiancé have to align on why you are considering eloping before you begin planning out the details of your day.
A lot of couples choose to elope in order,
to save money
to have a more intimate day
to avoid stresses of planning
Which are all super valid reasons to elope! However, when it comes to eloping remember that some people might be disappointed in not being their to witness the marriage and to celebrate with you.
This is why you and your boo need to align on the reason(s) so that once you have decided, you can share the news with friends and family and be totally in love with the plan and feel no quilt.
Chances are, if people are disappointed in the beginning, they will come around to the idea of your elopement and be more than happy for y'all. Be patient with these friends and family members because at the end of the day, they are your support and love you!
Now it's time to plan your elopement!
Once you are set on the idea of eloping, it is time to plan out exactly how you want everything to go.
Similarly to planning a traditional wedding, I find that the first step is to go big. No idea is too grand in this stage and you want to explore and entertain a lot of different options for your elopement.
Do you want to travel or stay local?
For me, when we were considering eloping, the idea of traveling to a spectacular location to get hitched seemed like a perfect way to have a marriage and a honeymoon all while saving some pennies. The option to fly to the South of France, rent an adorable airbnb and then get married on the rocky beaches of Carry La Rouet was picture perfect in my head. And then hey, we were already in France so why not hop over to Greece for our honeymoon?!
But had we wanted to stay local, in Arizona, there are dozens of magical places to elope without having to travel far at all.
It's all about what speaks to you and your fiancé and how you envision your day. No way is the wrong way, so if traveling is in the cards for you, go for it! If staying local, head on over to google and explore your state to find the best spots for your perfect elopement.
Do we have guests attend?
Honestly, whoever you want. I'm going to say that again.
Invite 👏🏼whoever 👏🏼you 👏🏼want!
I think a lot of people think that if you are eloping it's just you, your fiancé and an officiant. However, if there is one thing I've learned about elopements, it's this.
There are no rules.
Your elopement is for you and your boo and who ever you want to be involved. Some people have a couple friends or family members join or several. Personally I cap a guest count around 25-30 people but you can have whoever you want there!
To have a more intimate elopement I definitely think there is something extremely special when it is just you and your fiancé and maybe a handful of people there to celebrate with you. And there is nothing stopping you from throwing an informal party with all of the friends and family to celebrate with after your elopement!
Do we tell people or keep it secret?
I think that a safe bet is, yes, you should tell people about your elopement. You don't have to tell everyone but you should come up with a revel plan.
How you go about telling people can happen a couple different ways. Like with a traditional wedding, you can send out announcement cards to friends and family members who you would consider guests. Or you can choose to share the news privately to those closest to you and wait to announce your elopement after the fact.
Regardless of how you choose to spread the word, make sure that you are telling your family members and those closest to you in person. The last thing you want to have happen is for the news reach them in some other way because to everyone, you getting married is probably a big deal and you want to treat them with the same love and respect as you would want done to you. Think of how it would feel if your sibling or loved one left to get hitched and you found out on instagram when they post about it? That would sting.
When you share your news you don't have to over explain your reasons for eloping. It is more so out of courtesy for your loved ones so they feel included in a small way.
Are y'all seeing the common denominator here?
With eloping you get to focus on you. The expectations and "should's and shouldn'ts" of a traditional wedding fall away and you get to explore a whole new way to celebrate you and your fiancé coming together in marriage.
If you aren't totally sold on the idea of eloping just yet, that's ok. I'll be creating an elopement series with loads of more information like the "do's and don'ts of eloping" and "how much does it cost to elope".
We will get you to your special day I promise!! 💕